Making a French Home Livable (starting with no appliances, cupboards or closets)!

Last week was a very busy week!  PB was off to the US for a meeting, so I was able to leave work a little earlier and start unpacking my house, but I was immediately aware of the remaining furniture that I needed to get (like an armoire)!  It's difficult to set your house up for comfortable living when you have nowhere to hang your clothing . . . or store anything . . . or put your dishes!  My primary goal for the week was to be able to live at the house by the time my appliances showed up on Saturday.

I have an old wood armoire that I plan to refinish for the guest room, but it arrived full of webs (and a couple of spiders), so I've left it closed up for now!  Since there is really NO storage in older French homes, outside of the dirt-floored cave, I knew I'd need an area to store things that I don't want in the cave, such as off-season clothing (since armoires are generally smaller than a normal US closet).  So, I bought a small, inexpensive cloth armoire for the office . . . which is now serving as my only armoire since my nice wood one isn't going to show up until I'm back from vacation.

The left is for hanging clothes and the right for folded - this is a common layout here

For things you feel comfortable buying online, I'd recommend CDiscount.  I've purchased many items from them already and they've all been of good quality (at least of the quality I expected given the site information) with quick shipping.  Larger furniture will have a scheduled delivery date also (like my table & chairs).

I also received a very good recommendation from PB to use Darty for appliances.  Of course, his recommendation was under duress because I threatened to make him install my appliances if I had to find a place myself and ended up with them just dumped on my porch!  Darty was great about scheduling a time for delivery and installation, plus the men who installed my appliances were very nice, careful about not damaging my house and explained in very slow French (and a little English) what I needed to do before using my appliances.  I had realized that I was getting a French-sized fridge (I searched for one sized for 2-3 people - why cool empty space!), but I had not realized that I was buying a tiny oven!  The metric system still doesn't quite make sense to me, so I sometimes think I've figured out what the measurements mean only to find out that I'm very, very wrong.  I'm not sure my US baking pans will even fit!

For my American friends who are still worried about where my "kitchen" is, I've realized that my sink has the pipes for a dishwasher, so I'm still debating if I want to buy one and put it between the fridge and sink.  I'm not sure a dishwasher really makes sense for just one person - I often ran mine in the US only partly full because I'd run out of something.  More importantly, my cabinets will arrive shortly after I return from Austria . . . although, one will clearly fit next to my oven now, which I hadn't been expecting.

This photo is from Alinéa, which is where I bought the same blue cabinets!  No upper ones, just a selection of the lower free-standing cabinets.

I think that having a whole house to design (almost) from scratch has me doing some serious nesting because I have themes going everywhere!  Blue in the kitchen, teal in the attached laundry area (entry carpet and curtains for the slider door) and a mix of those colors in the adjacent bathroom.  Living room in black, white and green.  Dining area with black, silver and gray.  I've even finished my guest room . . . well, not the spidery furniture, but this part!  My guests will soon have a dresser next to the bed and a spider-free armoire also!

Bottom line is that my last apartment never felt like "home" and neither did the house I was just living in, but this place does!  Even though it's exhausting to assemble furniture, move boxes around, unpack and try to figure out where I want everything to go (often involving rearranging the furniture), I'm loving it!  I've went from grudgingly entering an Ikea once (and buying nothing) to making TWO visits to Alinéa in one week, plus making a third order online.

My new house even greeted me with a winter rose bloom!

Christmas Time in Paris! And an impromptu visit to Musée d'Orsay.

Since L’américaine is getting ready to head back to the US and Alexis is gone virtually the whole month, I thought I'd head to Paris for the weekend to see the Christmas market.

Christmas in Paris!  How could you go wrong?  Well, you could end up leaving this:

For this:

Welcome to our future if we don't limit pollution - endless gray smog

Worse, it could be not fog, but RECORD POLLUTION.  There was an anticyclone over France, which caused high smog levels in cities - higher than in the past 10 years.  I'd read it was supposed to clear out with wind over the weekend - no luck on Saturday though.  Since I was already in Paris before I knew that it hadn't improved, I headed to the Champs-Élysées market, along with half of Europe!  So many people and so many languages!  I'd say that I'm not sure if many French people go here because I heard Brits talking much more often, but that could just be because Brits (and Americans) are much louder in general!

If you think this is crowded, try coming back at night!

I've never been in France during this time of year before, so one of the first things I noticed is that soup takes over!  I will have a blog post that returns to this point later; however, the other thing that becomes abundantly clear is that there are certain foods the French eat (and drink) almost exclusively in the winter.  I kept seeing "tartiflette" listed places (along with a dish "gratin dauphinois," with the last word being similar to the word for dolphin.  Given some of the things they eat here, I was reluctant to order something that could turn out to be cheese-covered dolphin!

I saw (and smelled) something delicious though and decided it was time to try tartiflette with reblochon cheese.  It's like a potato casserole with cheese, lardon (a type of bacon) and onions.  It was good, but I'm guessing there are better versions available.  This particular stand had a chicken and salmon variation, but they didn't seem to be selling quickly.

There was an endless variety of vin chaud available at the market as well - avec épices (hot wine with spices), which I'd had before, but there was also vin chaud with fruit (oranges and sometimes lemons) and cinnamon - not all booths specified what type they were serving though!  There were also several offering vin chaud blanc (white wine), but I didn't see anyone drinking it.  I should have tried it anyway, but I decided to stick with red!  TIP: The booths closest to the metro entrances had 30 mL servings for 6 Euro (and a small serving for 4 Euro), but many booths further in had small servings for 5 Euro, which were actually 30 mL also.  A large was also 8 Euro at entrances and 7 Euro further in, so wait a few minutes and get a better price!

It has not snowed since I've been here and I could probably count on one hand the number of days it has rained (especially ALL DAY - I'm not missing Portland weather AT ALL right now), but it has hovered near freezing a lot more than it usually does in Oregon . . . so I was loving it that France will allow you to wander freely with your vin chaud!  It kept my hands toasty warm!

When I went to the small local market, I had originally expected something similar to Christmas markets at home, which tend to be filled with a lot of Christmas-themed stuff.  That isn't the case in France from what I've seen.  You will find a couple of booths with beautiful handmade ornaments or decorations, but most of it was handmade items that you might wish to give as a gift for Christmas.  My favorite thing about the offerings were the large number of brightly-colored booths!  I didn't buy it from this stand, but I have a lovely woven blue basket now, which can be used for shopping (there's no such thing as free bags at stores - you bring your own reusable bags) or a picnic.

This is all CHEESE - I'm not entirely certain how they get all of those colors!  And some of the apples below don't look edible - check out the black ones!

For more pictures of the market offerings, including my first frog legs, see my album here (no FB account required): Paris Album

I'd originally come to the markets to see all the Christmas lights, but it was a disappointment in that regard.  PB recommended that next year I should go to the Fête des Lumières in Lyon (which was this same weekend) if I want to see some really lovely lights, so that's on the agenda for early December 2017!  There were some nice lights on a nearby street, but the ones near my hotel were prettier.  It was lovely to be at the market right at the moment the lights turned on and started moving up the trees though!  I wouldn't come back to this market for the lights, but I found myself returning here three different times to look through all of the booths and to buy a couple of small gifts - certainly worth a visit just to see the variety of items on display!

I specifically reminded myself to bring my DSLR for this trip, but still forgot it!  Such a disappointment because, while the pollution had my chest feeling tight with exertion, it made for stunning photos with an eerie sky as backdrop.  Hey, if you're going to shorten your life by breathing in the polluted air, might as well make the best of it!

Fortunately, it rained overnight and it was clear blue skies on Sunday morning.

Musée d'Orsay
I decided I'd had enough market time on Saturday and I needed to decide how I wanted to spend Sunday.  The last time I was in Paris was May 2015 and I tried to go to the Musée d'Orsay, but the lines were crazy!  This time I purchased a ticket in advance on Digitick (skip the American-based sites with passes at 30+ Euro - my skip the line ticket was just 15.15 with service fee) and headed for entrance C - no line!  If you're interested in the museums of Europe, winter seems to be a great time to avoid crowds.

While the museum is known for it's impressionist paintings, I personally prefer brighter, bolder colors, so these were two of my favorites in the museum.  The museum had some great (and famous) impressionist works though and they WERE lovely; however, I think art is a very personal thing, so it is about what speaks to you personally (which can be different from day to day).

In fact, for a long time I didn't think that paintings really spoke to me at all, but then I realized that I just prefer paintings where people are not a primary focus or they're abstracted.  When it comes to depicting people, I prefer sculpture.  Although, this young lady appears to be taking an ancient selfie.

For me, I was able to visit the whole museum with starting after lunch, although I was there until closing and just barely finished the special exhibit.  I did not use the audio guide because I've learned that they just don't do it for me at art museums - I want to read the brief descriptions of what was changing in that era or why the art is remarkable, but mostly I just want to look at it and see what draws me in.  I don't want the audio guide telling me which art I should find most remarkable or all about the 5,893 brush strokes it took.  I understand that there are people who do, and for those people, the audioguides are currently 5 Euro!  Just to be contrary, I happen to love audio guides at cultural and historical museums and will listen to everything, even the bonus stuff.

I also enjoyed this edition of "translations gone wrong" - apparently, doing your laundry at the museum is now a "thing" . . . except "linge" is laundry and "langer" is changing, so NOT a laundry table after all!

I just learned today that poor Alexis dislocated his knee and won't be home until the end of January.  I'm the only person that he's become friends with who is currently in the area, so I will be making the hour trip to Poitiers to rescue his car from the train lot before it is towed!

I officially know who I'll be calling for that 2 AM ride to the hospital or "my car died in the middle of nowhere" incident now! 😈

Obtaining a French Residency Card and Renting a Home in France

Obtaining a French Residency Card

I've read horror stories about prefecture appointments and the difficulty involved in getting a Carte de Séjour, so I was expecting an unpleasant experience.  In my case, I was pleasantly surprised; however, this may have been because my documents were prepared by immigration attorneys and I had a French-speaking assistant who came with me.

The start to the appointment was rather ominous because the man looked at my documentation and muttered about never seeing a "European Blue Card" application before, that he didn't know what was required for my dossier and that he hoped we were prepared to be at the prefecture for a LONG time (all in French, of course).  I came across the same lack of knowledge about a European Blue Card at the consulate - it appears that not many people take advantage of this visa, even though it's one of the easiest ways to immigrate to France from a non-EU country.  Of course, you have to meet the educational or work experience requirements, plus a salary requirement, but then you're entitled to the same benefits as a resident and have a path to permanent residency.

Moulin Rouge, 2009

Fortunately, the prefecture official came back quickly with the binder for the European Blue Card (aka "passeport talent") and was able to confirm that I had all of the required documents and French translations.  Ironically, my original documents were barely glanced at.  All they really cared about were the colored copies that were stamped by the official translator and the translations.  Since I'll have my new address within 8 days of the appointment, they also issued my card with my new address so I didn't have to return to change it.

The official was actually extremely nice and seemed pleasantly surprised that I understood most of the French and was able to give my address and other information in French.  So, I am now in possession of my temporary card (through May 2017) with my permanent one on the way!  I officially have the legal right to live and work in France for the next four years! 😊

I might be homesick occasionally, but if I'd ever made a bucket list, living in France would have been on it.  Ten years ago, I was on my first trip to Europe and I'd been to Paris earlier in the trip, but was returning to the city for one day before I went home.  I remember feeling completely at home, which hadn't been the case for the rest of my trip.  I thought it was just the familiarity because I'd been there before, but when I went to London the next day to fly out, I didn't feel the same, despite speaking nearly the same language as the Brits!  When I returned in 2009, Paris was the only city that I visited for a second time "just because" - I returned to Barcelona and Rome because I'd missed large parts of both cities due to missing a flight (Barcelona) and being extremely ill (Rome).  There wasn't anything in particular that I went back to Paris for though, other than because I really loved France.

Paris 2009 with a truly awful hair cut!

TIP: If you don't have utilities in your name, an attestation of insurance coverage is adequate proof of address (along with your rental contract) for the prefecture.  This also worked when opening my French bank account.

Renting a House in France

There are so many new things about life here (the measurement system being metric, the language, the culture) that at times it can be overwhelming.  I was really not enthusiastic about moving because I knew it was likely that I'd have to do a move-in "inventory" and sign a contract that was all in French.  I also knew that I'd have to figure out how to obtain utilities in French.

I'm very fortunate that I have the general manager that I do!  Clearly, it's not part of his job responsibilities to help me with my house (which falls squarely into the "personal" arena in France), but he did it anyway.  It would have taken me hours to understand everything that was being said, try to make sure the contract reflected what we agreed on and I probably would have been so distracted trying to translate that I would have missed things (which was my experience when viewing houses initially).  PB was able to quickly communicate with the owners, was meticulous about noticing everything and made sure that certain things would be done before I moved in and that they were noted in the contract (like a holder for the shower head).

If you do not speak fluent French and you know ANYONE who does, enlist their help!  The tenant is responsible for basically any damage that is not noted on the move-in report (and not normal wear-and-tear).  PB also told me to take photos of everything.  The couple I'm renting from seem like very nice people, but PB was insistent that I needed to be cautious to protect myself.

I accidentally took a photo of them while photographing chips in the paint.  The infamous PB is to the right and appears to be inspecting my fireplace.

I'd read of other ex-pats having trouble getting utilities turned on in their name (or needing the phone number of the prior occupant to switch the phone over); however, I had no difficulties.  What is strange is that the owners were able to provide my info to the electric and water company without me ever speaking to the companies myself and the bills will apparently be in my name now; this would not happen in the US!  (UPDATE: I received a form to sign and confirm)  Most of the sites for internet service asked for the prior phone number, but I was able to select an option to use my address instead.  After comparing offers, the offer from Orange was the best for my area.  Orange's site was all in French, but I understand enough that I was able to order service (and it was supposed to be on by the 15th, then I received a 2nd message for the 21st - that turned out to be for my TV service though).  The owners indicated that I should contact the local mayor's office to determine what to do about trash pickup - usually the website for the commune will have that info, but the one for my town is useless in that regard.  It did inform me of the rate for my tax d'habitation next year though!

For those who don't know, tax d'habitation is a tax that renters pay, which I believe is a percentage of the rent.  It is based on where you live on January 1, but is not due until later in the year (the bill at my current house arrived in November, due in December).  This is on top of the tax that the property owner pays (which is likely passed down to the renter as well through the rent price)!

Shipping a Container from the US to France

If you've never shipped goods internationally (I hadn't), the differences may come as a surprise.  First, they generally want to pack your stuff themselves to ensure that it doesn't get damaged, so you just sit back and watch.  They'll generally also sort out the items that you cannot import.

I only needed a 20' container because I decided to replace some of my furniture in France.  For reference, the cost for the container and insurance was ~$10,500.

Your items then disappear into transportation limbo until somebody contacts you about 2 months later to tell you that your shipment has arrived at the port.  In my case, I received this communication, then was told over a week later that it was at the port again.  Apparently, the first time they were a little too hasty and it wasn't actually AT the port yet.  There were some shipping issues and the boat was delayed; however, once it arrived on December 2, they were able to schedule the delivery for December 8.  It will not always be this fast because your shipment can get held up if customs decides they want to look at everything in it.

International Move - Pleasant Surprises:

• The moving company will pack all of your belongings
• When unpacking the container, they will also put all of your boxes in the specific rooms that you want them in (I recommend learning the names of the rooms in French - once I made the connection for them between the English on the box and the correct room in French, they didn't have to ask me for EVERY box)
• They will unwrap all of your furniture and take the heaps of paper with them!
• Not only did they put my furniture where I wanted it, but when I realized that my bedroom furniture wouldn't fit that way, they rearranged the furniture for me
• Some of my furniture had been taken apart for the move - the movers put it all back together, so I had fully functional furniture!😀

International Move - Unpleasant Surprises:

• Three movers came to my house in the US.  One of them was apparently new because he didn't know what he was supposed to leave behind.  I had a cupboard labeled "do not pack" because it contained cleaning supplies that are banned for import - he packed them.  Fortunately, I noticed and they unpacked the box because I needed the cleaners at my old place!  Had I not noticed though, I could have imported a whole box of banned items!!!😣
• One of my boxes was completely missing.  It contained a nice monitor for editing my DSLR photography (replaceable) and an old computer with files that I wanted to go through before disposing of it - hopefully there was nothing I actually needed!  The worst part are the framed photos that are also missing from the same box.  One of the photos was the first DSLR picture that I printed of my own work, so it had a lot of sentimental value. I'm still waiting to hear from the US on whether they could locate the box in the warehouse there.
• One of my other boxes, labeled "electronic equipment" had a side that was damaged.
• Houses here are not made for American-sized furniture.  A lot of the furniture here is designed to come apart, for good reason.  My couch barely fit through the door and my queen-size box spring was too tall and too wide to make it up the stairs no matter how they turned it.  The movers suggested that I should instead have two small box springs and left my current one in the living room . . . I will be sleeping on a mattress on the floor until I remedy this problem.

TIP: After looking for a new box spring online (not exactly a box spring, but rather a "sommier"), I'd recommend just leaving your bed and buying a new one in Europe.  I can purchase an entire set with mattress, sommier and headboard for only slightly more than the cost for JUST a sommier.  Not to mention, a "queen size" bed here is slightly wider and slightly shorter than the US version, so nothing is going to be quite the right fit!

Hosting an Ex-Pat Meetup and Wine Tasting

France goes all out for Christmas, even my local grocery store has blue lights up to match the blue part of its logo!  Every little town seems to have lights and decorations as well!  Even though I never liked traveling at this time of year, I'm enjoying the experience of seeing how the holidays are done in a different part of the world.

Meeting Ex-Pats
Since it will take some time to be fluent in French, I've decided that having a good mix of French and ex-pat friends is ideal!  Plus, with Rita in La Rochelle most of the time, L’américaine moving back to the US next year and Alexis gone at least one week a month, it will be good to broaden my circle.  L’américaine was still in town last weekend (before leaving for the holidays), so we went to the Christmas market together to meet up with a British man, a Turkish woman and a Frenchman, who wanted to practice his English. 

The market that I'd found was back near Angoulême and, after being there twice, I can say with certainty that I would never live there.  Even if I get tired of small town life and find myself in a larger city someday, it is definitely off my list.  The design of the streets is chaos, there was an area with TWO roundabouts looped together and nobody seemed sure how to intersect the second roundabout and there was SO MUCH TRAFFIC.  I'm glad I'm taking the train to Paris this coming weekend - driving in big cities is just not for me!

One advantage of a larger city was the opportunity to eat some ethnic food.  We ended up at a highly-rated Indian food place, which was REALLY good.  It was a little funny though because the French guy who joined us was, of course, worried it would be too spicy.  "Spicy" is not something the French are accustomed to, so they don't care for it.  The food had a lot of flavor, but it wasn't spicy at all, so the restaurant may be catering to French preferences?

JL met up with us first.  He's the French guy who wanted to join us to keep up on his English, which he became very fluent in while working in England.  We were almost done with lunch when BB arrived.  She's originally from Turkey, but speaks English fluently also.  One thing that is a little culturally different here is that if you're married in the US, it doesn't seem that people often go out to meet new friends separately.  Here, it appears to be normal.  BB is married to a Frenchman and JL has a baby due soon with his girlfriend, but both of their partners are French and weren't really interested in a group outing for English-speakers, so they came alone.

They were also from the area and were surprised that I'd learned of this market because they'd never heard of it.  My trick is that I always review all of the events for ALL of the nearby regions in the English-language Living Magazine, which is free, and make note of ones that sound like they could be interesting.  I don't often post links, but I really believe this magazine is incredibly useful for people who live in the area.  I learned about the literary festival, Vendée Globe, Gastronomades and the Christmas market from the magazine - it's the answer to PB's question of "how do you find anything to do in the country on weekends?" (http://www.livingmagazine.fr/) 

My favorite thing about the market was that nearly everything was handmade.  I tried my first vin chaude, which is a spiced hot wine, basically mulled wine.  The ladies selling it were concerned that I might need sugar in my wine, but it was plenty sweet and had great flavor - the spices used were quite nice!  To the best of my knowledge, I've never tried mulled wine . . . or if I did, it was different and I didn't care for it.  This was really good and I'll certainly enjoy another glass or two for the season.  I also bought another winter hat - this one is a little more French!  It's hard to tell in the photo, but it puffs out in the back (see the second photo for the style).  I'm also wearing my new winter scarf-blanket.  In the winter, the French pull out these giant half-blanket sized scarfs, which you certainly need!  It was below freezing every night last week and barely into the teens (in Celsius) during the day.  Due to the cultural obsession with accessorizing, I own more accessories living in France than I've had in my life!

JL and BB were both really nice and I'm glad that we met them!  The British man never made it, but the four of us had fun looking through the market and choosing a few items.  L’américaine and I also convinced them that taking photos of everything is "American" and that a group selfie was necessary to commemorate the outing.

I think when it comes to making new friends in a foreign country, you have to just continue putting yourself out there - meet up with people, hang out and see what "sticks."  It's entirely possible that you'll meet people and never see them again or somebody will fail to show up (like the Brit); however, eventually you'll find your tribe!

Wine Open House
At the food festival, the winery that Alexis and I bought our pineau from had told us they were having an open house on December 3.  After we said our good-byes to BB and JL, L’américaine and I headed to the open house so we could sample some wine and stock up.

Since having friends over for a meal is a common occurrence in France, and alcohol is virtually always served, I decided to take advantage of the "buy 6, get 1 free" offer that they had going on.  I now have a good mix of a sweet white sparkling wine, a rosé sparkling wine and I picked up a bottle of the "very special" sparkling wine, which had fruit flavors that a normal person could taste!  The very special bottle is, of course, the lovely blue one below.  I'll be saving that one for a special occasion!

It was really interesting that most people were not spitting anything out or dumping their glasses (although I had to because I was the driver).  There were trays of cheese, bread and mini desserts that were well-eaten by the guests though!  The winery staff seemed perfectly willing to let each person try all 10 sparkling wines and the regular and the pineau . . . even when I asked for a small pour, it was ~1/3 full!

So, all-in-all, another enjoyable weekend in the French countryside.  Next weekend, I have decided to take a little break from country life, so I'm headed to Paris for the weekend!  I didn't spend any time in Paris earlier in the year nor since I've returned, so seeing the large Christmas market there felt like a perfect excuse to visit again.

Homesick and Co-hosting a Birthday Party in France

The last couple of weeks have been a little rough for me.  I missed my first major family holiday (Thanksgiving) and it was especially difficult to see the photos and realize that I'm missing out on all of these moments.  I'm also missing all of my niece's "firsts" since she was just one month old when I left.  I know my nephews and niece won't really remember these years when they're older, but could I really live here beyond 3 to 4 years?  Could I be happy as the aunt/sister/daughter/friend who only shows up once or twice a year?  I'm not sure I can answer that yet.

What made it worse was having PB tell me that I always have to be here for year-end inventory and I won't ever get to go home for Christmas (before I arrived, I'd been told I always had to take the week of Christmas off for the plant shutdown, so this was an unpleasant surprise).😢  Fortunately, he reversed course a little when he realized that I was upset about this - while I do need to be here for the year-end inventory, in 2017 I could still fly out on Saturday, the 23rd, and be home for Christmas.  The same would be true in other years as well, so he told me that he's certain that we can work something out.

The other thing that suddenly started bothering me was just acknowledging that I'm living in a country where I have no family and no long-term, really close friends.  I have friends here now, but I think it would feel like more of an obligation if I needed their help with something serious (say, a 2 AM hospital visit), whereas I have friends in the US who would WANT to be there if I really needed them (and I'd similarly want to be there for them).  In other words, I have friends here who'd help me move, but not help me move bodies. 😉

I know my blog probably seems mostly positive because I truly do love France, but I've come across a few ex-pat blogs now and it's pretty consistent that we all have tough times.  

I've been lucky to avoid the bureaucratic issues mostly, although nobody seems to be able to figure out HOW to get me a social number.  I've also been fortunate to make a few friends quickly, but you just don't replace friendships of years, or decades, so easily.  Given that, I view occasional homesickness as normal . . . but I'm glad it passed again for now!

Co-Hosting a French Birthday Party
On another topic, Alexis and I had a tough time trying to decide what to do for L’américaine's birthday.  Should we bring flowers, a good cheese and champagne to the festival?  But then what would she do with them all day?  Maybe we could buy her something at the festival?  We wandered off alone a couple of times to look around, but we couldn't decide on anything specific to buy for her since everyone pretty much bought what they really wanted on the spot.

We finally decided that we should host a dinner party for her (and I requested the same main dish he'd made for me).  Since L’américaine and Alexis are neighbors, it was more convenient to have it at his house.  With the long hours that I often work, we decided that it made more sense for him to do the main dish.  He also wanted to do the apéritif, which I thought just meant alcohol, so I offered to manage the entrée, dessert and flowers.  It turns out an apéritif can be more than just a few chips or peanuts with your drink, it can be a lot of small bread pieces with different toppings, so we skipped a separate entrée.  With just dessert and flowers, I felt like I was getting off pretty easy, especially since the birthday celebration had been my idea, but Alexis insisted that it was "his pleasure."

I showed up 30 minutes early to help get everything ready and had a minor moment of embarrassment because I was showing Alexis my temporary Carte de Sejour and he immediately noticed and asked about my "divorced" status.  I hadn't really thought about it being on my card when I showed it to him nor had I realized that he didn't already know I'm divorced.  I wasn't quite sure what to say about it other than to confirm that yes, I am indeed a divorcée.  Fortunately, L’américaine showed up then and I was spared having to decide if I was required to provide any further explanation.

Overall, the dinner went well, although with champagne to start and pineau with dinner (which is stronger than wine), the conversation became rather lively as the evening went on!  It also went a little late for a work night, but I didn't realize until the following day that I'd left Alexis with all of the cleaning as well!  😔  

It is funny that there are so many things about French culture that seem foreign to us that L’Américaine and I still ask some of the same questions of new French people, like, "Is it really true that if a guy smiles at you and you smile back, he will assume you're interested?"  The answer has consistently been "yes," but as Americans, we smile back just to be polite.  It's a real learning curve to discover that simple things like this can lead to a misunderstanding!  It's so unbelievable for us that we've had to ask four different French people if this is ACTUALLY true.

It's also entertaining to watch a French person's reaction to learning that it is perfectly acceptable in the US to go on a first date on Friday night, kiss the guy, and go out with a different guy on Saturday and kiss him too . . . and neither guy would assume he was your boyfriend!  Not that all US guys would like this or all women do it, but if you want to watch a French person's eyebrows raise up nearly into their hairline, explain this little bit of American dating etiquette to them. 😂  Or that you can do whatever you want with other people until you actually discuss your dating status.  There's nothing so simple as "we kissed, so we're exclusive" in the US!

Sadly, Alexis is now gone for the next couple of weeks, so I was "forced" to expand my social circle even more by meeting up with EX-PATS!  More on this in my next blog.

Hosting My First French Dinner and Les Gastronomades (aka The Food Festival)

Hosting my First French Dinner
It's hard to believe that I've been in France for two months already!  It feels like the time has flown by, but in other ways, it feels like I've been gone a REALLY long time.  In part, that's because I've established more of a life here this time than I did before - last time, I lived like a long-term tourist!  Along those lines, last weekend I stayed in the local area again and had a lot of fun doing so!  The plans started with inviting L’Américaine to join me at a food festival in Angoulême on Saturday.  Of course, I also invited Alexis and he wanted to go as well.  For the Anglos out there, Alexis is not pronounced like in English (uh-lex-sus) but rather uh-lex-ee (hard e, "s" is silent).

Additionally, there was the issue of me reading my new French book, so Alexis suggested he would come over on Thursday to help.  I thought it was a good opportunity to return the favor and make him dinner, although I warned him that my work schedule was crazy enough that he might get an American classic - takeout pizza.  He actually said he thought pizza sounded good, so it became a hybrid meal of takeout pizza with a French appetizer and dessert!  Pizza here is not like at home though, as I've posted about in my early blogs.  More high-quality toppings and a LOT less cheese.

Not the same pizza that I ordered, but from the same place!  I was too busy trying to coordinate my first French-style dinner to take photos!

Alexis ended up needing to reschedule for Friday and a group of co-workers were going to the beer bar on Friday for an early birthday drink for L’Américaine, so I joined them and Alexis met up with us there.  It was fun to have a drink with everyone and see people outside of work a little.  A lot of the conversation was in French though, which is one of the things that makes it challenging for me to meet new friends here; however, it was still a fun way to spend an hour before Alexis and I headed out.

I've never been a super domestic person, so I was half convinced my appetizer would be a disaster, but Alexis thought it was good and I enjoyed it.  I'd stuck with simple tartines (baguette slices) with chèvre that I blended with fresh ground pepper and thyme.  Once they were toasted and the cheese melted a bit, I topped them with a mixed berry jam and a drizzle of honey.  The pineau that my French co-worker, CB (resident wine expert), suggested was a hit as well!  We'd tried to keep the pizza warm while we had the appetizer, but the temperature was a little too high, so it cooked the pizza a bit - not great, but we just laughed it off.  I had delicious little desserts from my favorite bakery to end the meal with.  It might not have been perfect, but overall, my first French dinner went pretty well.

Learning to Read in French
It was during my reading lesson that Alexis learned that I have a blog and that he's in it, which he found amusing, except he didn't like his fake name!  As it turns out, he's less concerned about his privacy than he is about being stuck with a name he doesn't like.  This is probably for the best because I found myself accidentally referring to him as Pierre in real life. 😂

My reading lesson was, well, less humiliating than it could have been.  I made it through a whole 14 pages before I couldn't take anymore.  It reminds me of being in first grade again, when you're still coming across a lot of new words to sound out or guess at.  To his credit, Alexis is a good teacher - he might have laughed a couple of times, but he's really patient and helpful with the pronunciation and ensuring that I understand what I've read.  The book is about a green 2CV, an old European car, and a father-son road trip . . . I'm not entirely sure if he picked this book because he thought I'd like it or because he thought HE would like it.😏  Here is a picture of a 2CV that I borrowed from the internet:

I have no idea how long it took me to read 14 pages, but it felt like two years!  Poor Alexis was yawning, even though he tried to tell me he wasn't tired - maybe just bored given I was reading at a pace of about one page per 10 minutes!  I'm not sure that he really understood what he was getting himself into when he volunteered to read the book with me - at this rate, he'll still be helping me read it when my residence card expires four years from now!

Les Gastronomades
The next day, one of our other French co-workers, YV, joined us on our trip to the food festival.  The festival was a lot bigger than I'd been expecting and had a really good attendance, meaning it was a bit crowded.  There was a good selection of foods and wines to sample though and I left with a really lovely pineau rosé, which I've never seen before - I'm all set for future French dinner parties now!  I'm not a fan of tomatoes, but I purchased a tomato tapenade that was delicious and perfect for using up my remaining chèvre and bread slices.  Everyone purchased a few food or drink items, but most of the day was spent wandering around sampling everything!  We did stop off for a small lunch in an area that smelled like barbecue.  It wasn't, of course, but it was still delicious and quite different from anything I've eaten so far in France.

One of the other highlights of the day was trying the "Beaujolais nouveau."  I had seen the signs for it, but had no idea what the big deal was.  L’Américaine said it's an acquired taste and she didn't like it, but I did.  I've since learned that it is a very young wine, bottled right after harvest.  This leads to more fruity flavor and less tannin, which could be why I like it since I've already noticed that red wines mentioning "tannin" as a dominate flavor are ones that I usually don't like.  The young man is laughing in the photo below because the crazy American ladies told him that we wanted to take his photo to document our first tasting of this wine and that I planned to include it in my blog.  I really do prefer candid photos of people over staged smiles!

Apparently, taking photos of random smiling strangers is not common here because Alexis was teasing me about having found myself a new boyfriend!  Of course, my new "boyfriend" also looks like he's in his early 20s, which is a little on the young side for me!  I am beginning to think that French men grow up a little more quickly than American men though because it's rare that Alexis does or says something that reminds me that he's in his early 20s.  In contrast, some of the American men I know in their late 20s still do and say many things that remind me that they are younger and not really my "peer" in terms of life experience.

Sadly, we did learn that Alexis is not willing to carry all of our purchases for us 😢, but he does still live up to the reputation of French men being thoughtful.  He pointed out that we should take a short walk around the market area so that we had a view of the city.  Since it was my first time in the city, I enjoyed getting to see it.  I was pretty tired by the end of the day, so he also offered to drive, but I'd quit sampling any wine or alcohol several hours before we were going to leave, so it was logical that I'd remain the driver (I thought so anyway).😊

Since it was L’Américaine's birthday this week, and Alexis and I spend the most time with her, we decided that we should have a dinner for her on her actual birthday.  Monday's blog will be all about co-hosting my first French birthday dinner!